|
Serving
Students at
Santa Ana
College and
Santiago
Canyon College
INDONESIA
Etiquette
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Introductions
Introductions
in Indonesia are unhurried and formal. Hasty introductions show a
lack of respect. This applies to all Indonesians, from executives
to laborers. Handshaking lightly with everyone in the room is customary
in Indonesia upon arrival and again upon departure; avoid using your left
hand. Indonesian Chinese may combine a bow with a handshake.
Chinese men are more likely than other Indonesian ethnic groups to be comfortable
shaking hands with a woman. The traditional Hindu greeting involves
a slight bow with the palms of the hands together, as if praying, called
the namaste. However, it is also an acceptable alternative to a handshake
when a Western businesswoman greets a Hindu Indonesian man.
Indonesian
handshakes may be rather limp and may last for over ten seconds.
Aside from handshakes, there is no public contact between the sexes in
Indonesia. (see rules relating to physical contact below)
Businesspersons
line up so that the most important persons are introduced first.
When two people are introduced, the name and title of the highest ranked
person is stated first.
Names
Every
variation of personal naming patterns can be found among Indonesia's myriad
ethnic groups. Westerners often experience difficulty dealing with
Indonesian names. Always take your time over an introduction.
Repeat the title and name of the person and ask if you are pronouncing
them correctly. If possible, write the name down phonetically.
No matter how difficult or unusual sounding a name, do not make fun of
it.
People
may have one name or two, given name followed by a family name or vice
versa, or one name and one initial. Most business people you meet
should be addressed with at least a title and their name. A Westerner
may use Mr., Mrs., or Miss, plus their name. However, be aware that
you may be omitting other titles, important both to the person and your
understanding of that person. The traditional Indonesian forms of
Mr. and Madam, Mrs., or Miss are: Bapak = Mr. (this term precedes
any other titles) and Ibu = Madam, Mrs., or Miss (any woman, married or
unmarried). Note that Bapak literally means "father," and Ibu is
"mother." In a formal introduction, the preferred sequence is:
• 1.
Bapak or Ibu
• 2.
Academic title, if any (alternatively, an academic title may be stated
at the end of this list)
• 3.
Title of nobility
• 4.
The individual's given and family name
• 5.
Business or political title
Fortunately,
most Indonesians will accept sincere attempts by Westerners to express
native names and titles. As a general rule, among ethnic Indonesians,
the average citizen will have only one name while the middle class will
tend to have two. Usually, the higher the social standing, the longer
the names. Long names are often shortened for everyday use.
An individual with two names often uses one name plus the initial of the
other name.
A Muslim
male who has completed his pilgrimage to Mecca is entitled to the honorific
Haji. A woman who has done so has the title Hajjah. Note that
these titles are not automatically conferred on spouses; they must be individually
earned by making the pilgrimage. However, when in doubt, include
it.
Chinese
names generally consist of a family name followed by two (sometimes one)
personal names. Married Chinese retain their maiden names.
Although Westerners commonly address a married woman as Mrs. plus her husband's
family name, it is more appropriate to call her Madam plus her maiden family
name. Some Chinese adopt an English first name; others
use their initials. As you inquire of an Indonesian how you should
address him or her, be forward in explaining what he or she should call
you. Indonesians may be equally unsure as to which of your names
is your surname. Follow their lead as to the degree of formality.
First names only are not used.
Indonesia
was a colony of the Netherlands, and usually uses Dutch academic titles.
These titles include: Drs = Doktorandus, a graduate in any field
except engineering or law (male); Dra = Doktorartda, the above degree when
awarded to a woman; Ir = Insinjur, a graduate with an engineering degree
(male or female); and S H = Sarjana Hukum, a graduate with a law degree
(male or female). Westerners should use their usual academic titles,
rather than translate them into the Indonesian equivalent.
Physical
Contact
Most ethnic
Indonesians are Muslim; the majority of the others are Hindu. Traditionally,
there is no physical contact between men and women in these cultures.
If a woman touches a religious Muslim male, he must ritually cleanse himself
before he prays again. Because of this, women should not offer to
shake hands with Indonesian men nor should men offer to shake hands with
Indonesian women unless a Westernized Indonesian offers to shake hands
first. Upon greeting, the traditional Muslim Indonesian salutation
is the word setamat, which means "peace."
Indonesians
are used to being in close quarters and needing little private space.
In conversation some body contact is therefore common, but not patronizing
or overly intimate. Touching a stranger of the same sex while
in conversation is very common. Contact between people of the same
sex is permitted and is interpreted as nothing except friendship.
Public displays of affection between men and women even between husband
and wife is very inappropriate. Many Indonesians consider the head
the seat of the soul; never touch someone's head, even of a child.
Non-Verbal
Communications
Indonesians
are polite and will extend endless courtesies to visitors whom they trust
and like.
Among
both Muslims and Hindus, the left hand is considered unclean. Avoid
using the left hand when giving or receiving anything, whenever possible;
however, both hands can be used when needed. The foot is also considered
unclean. Do not move anything with your feet, do not point with your
feet, and do not touch anything with your feet. Do not rest feet
on tables or desks. Do not show the soles of feet or shoes; sit with
legs crossed at the knee but not with one ankle on your knee.
Attracting
the attention of someone with the palm up and wagging one finger, as in
the United States, can be construed as an insult and it is considered impolite
to point with your forefinger. To attract the attention of someone,
hold the hand out, palm downward, and make a scooping motion with the fingers.
Point with the right thumb and closed fist, like a hitchhiker; this gesture
is also used to mean "go first." Pounding one fist into the palm
of your other hand is an obscene gesture among some Indonesians.
Standing tall with your hands on your hips is interpreted as a sign
of anger and aggression.
Smiling
is a cultural tradition and Indonesians smile frequently, even in an uncomfortable
or difficult situation. Visitors should avoid the temptation of losing
their temper. Respect monuments and places of worship.
Dining
Indonesians
prefer home receptions and buffets to more formal entertainment.
During such a visit, the host will typically meet the visitor at the door,
greet them warmly, usher them in and then show them where to sit.
It is appropriate to bring a hostess gift. Polite conversation will
follow and there will be a drink (tea, coffee, or soft drink) offered.
Eventually food will be placed at table. The food is ignored while
the conversation continues or until the guest is clearly invited to eat;
eating signals the end of the visit.
Never
pass or accept anything with the left hand. Leave some on the plate
to indicate more food is not wanted.
When invited
to a home, a gift is appreciated (use the right hand to offer it).
Giving food as a thank you gift such as coffee, candy, or fruit after the
visit is appropriate.
Entertaining
Many Indonesians
have negative images of foreigners. Foreigners exploited Indonesia
for some 300 years. Social encounters are the best way for you to
dispel that preconceived image; take advantage of any invitations to social
events. Establishing a successful business relationship requires
establishing a social relationship as well. Invitations to social
events may not come immediately; let the Indonesians make the first invitation.
You cannot successfully host a social event until you have been a guest
at a Indonesian event. Generally, spouses may be invited to dinner
but not to lunch; however, no business will be discussed at an event where
spouses are present. Respond to written invitations in writing.
Hosting
a party for Indonesians can be complex. Send out written invitations,
addressed to husband and wife, a week in advance. Red or pink paper
is a good choice for invitations; do not print invitations on white or
blue paper. Do not expect many responses in writing, even if your
invitations say R.S.V.P. Find excuses to follow up, either by phone
or in person, to remind your guests of the affair. Be prepared to
explain what event the party is celebrating, the entire guest list,
and who the guest of honor is. Be sure to invite many Indonesians
of the same ethnic group. While the business executive husband probably
speaks English, his wife probably does not.
Parties
are held early, from 7 to 9 p.m.; Indonesians arise early and retire early.
Indonesians find buffets more comfortable than sit down dinners with assigned
places. Do not depend on Indonesian servants to plan the meal; the
food must be sophisticated. Observant Muslims do not drink alcohol.
Show great respect toward your guest of honor. He or she is the last
to arrive and the first to go through the buffet line. The guest
of honor is escorted through the buffet line and each dish is explained.
The guest of honor is walked to his or her car at the end of the evening.
Water
and Food
Don't
drink tap water anywhere in Indonesia. Only drink commercially bottled
water and use it for making ice cubes and for dental hygiene.
Don't
eat raw, unpeeled fruits and uncooked vegetables or salads;
any meat or poultry which is not cooked well-done; food that is prepared
in advance and then left to stand; raw or undercooked seafood and
shellfish, especially Sushi; and food from street side stalls.
Wash all fruit and vegetables in bottled, chlorine-treated or soapy water
with a brush and use separate cutting boards for vegetables and meats so
as to prevent cross-contamination.
Links
to More Information
.
Sources:
U.
S. Department of State |
